Gottman’s Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse

According to John Gottman, there are four destructive patterns of communication that can cause serious damage to a relationship. He calls them the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse.

So far I have covered Criticism, Defensiveness and Stonewalling. ¬†Each of these patterns is capable of causing serious damage to a relationship, but it’s the fourth horsemen, Contempt, that is the most deadly.

Why is Contempt so deadly?

In Gottman’s research he found that when contempt has hijacked a couples communication, it’s the biggest predictor of divorce.

Listen to this short video to learn what contempt sounds like and what can be done to reverse its course.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Mary Beth George
Mary Beth George is a Licensed Professional Counselor, Certified Gottman Therapist, Master Trainer for the Gottman Institute and co-owner of Couples Counseling & Psychotherapy Associates. She is an empty nester with a passion for rescue dogs, traveling and spending time with people that make her laugh.